Tuesday, October 18, 2011

Ron’s World Famous Hamburger Stew

I present to you the Ultimate Comfort Food - quick, cheap, nutritious, easy-to-make, and very, very good! Take a bow, Hamburger Stew! You deserve the kudos! We have standards, here in the whistle-clean test kitchens of Nicole Parton's Favorite Recipes. Those standards may be low (we've renamed the “five-second rule” the “ten-second rule”) but they're still standards. 
Our prestigious panel of Anonymous Taste Testers has given three thumbs up to Ron's World Famous Hamburger Stew (It would have been four thumbs, but one of our taste-testers had an unfortunate accident when he stuck in his thumb and pulled out a plum from the garburator).         

Does this bag make me look fat?
 Hurry up with that bandage!!!

A question, Dollinks: Why is “garburator” spelled the way it is while “carburetor” - which sounds exactly the same - is spelled so differently? (Bandage! Bandage! Arrrrrgh!) For that matter, I’ve never found it easy to spell “broccoli,” with its naughty double Cs and single L. Which reminds me, why is the definition of “bag man” so different from the definition of “bag lady”? (Must ... find ... thumb! Must ... find ... hospital!) Would someone please tell me why this man is bleeding all over my kitchen floor? It really is true that you can’t find good help, these days.
Ron’s World Famous Hamburger Stew:
1 tsp. cooking oil
1 or 2 large onions, coarsely chopped (Ron says you can never have too many onions)
2 or 3 chopped garlic cloves or a generous sprinkling of garlic powder 
½ lb. to 1 lb. lean ground beef 
½ c. dried shitaki mushrooms, hydrated in boiling water for 10 min. 
8-to-10 crimini (brown) mushrooms, halved
1 - 10 fl. oz. (284 mL) can condensed cream of mushroom soup
½ c. fresh or frozen peas
Salt, to taste (Ron adds none)
Heat oil over medium-high in large pot. Fry onions and garlic until soft, stirring frequently. Add and break up lean ground beef until pink color disappears. Drain and add hydrated shitaki mushrooms and halved fresh mushrooms. Reduce heat to low and stir in cream of mushroom soup. Cover and simmer 30 min., stirring occasionally. Add peas in final 5 min. of cooking. Salt to taste. Serve over mashed potatoes. 
Note: I’m gallavanting around again, Dollinks! I’ll be out of town several days, swanning around eating restaurant food. Keep those cards and letters coming in to My male secretary (who doubles as one of my Anonymous Taste Testers) will answer them as soon as he recovers from surgery and learns how to type again. 

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