Follow-up: Frankie Hits Pay Dirt

Knowing that Frankie doesn’t have a nickel to his name, a philanthropic reader has taken pity on his plight. In today’s recipe for Broken Glass Dessert, Frankie promised two major food manufacturers the widespread publicity and renown that only the Stainless Steel Kitchens of Nicole Parton’s Favorite Recipes can deliver - as long as those food giants sent him a heap of small, unmarked bills.

I’m embarrassed to say Frankie’s attempt at extortion succeeded. Thanks to an anonymous reader, he struck it rich this afternoon. Unfortunately, this disgusting maneuver has already gone to his head. 

Frankie immediately demanded a bigger tank, and said he’d pay for it. He promised to tip me “a fin” if I were a “good girl,” driving him to the fish store so he could choose his new home. He insisted we start feeding him a regular ration of advertised products with a banner proclaiming “Frankie’s Favorite Fare,” in case anyone considered kicking more cash his way. 

Ron and I are mortified. Frankie’s already started laundering the money, to familiarize himself with the term “filthy lucre.” Please, readers - no more! Frankie’s greed is our shame.