Gunning for Bear!

“Pick the best spot, and caliber, when taking aim at a bruin” - Author Jim Zumbo, Outdoor Online Life Magazine, © 2009

In the Time Zone and at the Latitude Where I Live, people take their hockey very seriously. That means nothing to me! I stick to my cooking! I’m above the brutish fray! 

“No one will argue that an acceptable firearm for bear hunting must be capable of putting the bruin down right now, instantly disabling it” - Jim Zumbo, Outdoor Life Magazine

I found an interesting recipe for Bruin Pot Roast this week.

“A bear is incredibly tenacious but has no supernatural powers” - Jim Zumbo, Outdoor Life Magazine

If your teeth are sharper than the bear’s, you could rip and shred the meat to bits. 

“If a bear is directly facing you and standing, a shot to the exact center of its chest will ... put it down instantly” - Jim Zumbo, Outdoor Life Magazine

I’m sure that would be quite satisfying, especially if you serve the dish on a bed of ice.

“None of those bruins needed more than one shot, and none traveled more than 75 yards after being hit” - Jim Zumbo, Outdoor Life Magazine

Some people like their bear fricasseed or braised. I personally enjoy seeing bruins in a stew - up to their necks in hot water. The meat can be tough and unpalatable. You may have to work overtime to chew it up. The paradox is that you must think “outside the box” ... no biting!

“I recently went on a bear hunt in Canada where five members of our party dropped bears instantly …” - Jim Zumbo, Outdoor Life Magazine

Canada’s the place to do it! Bruins are unpopular in the time zone where I live. Here’s how I’d like to deal with them:

This recipe requires extra time 

for marination

Bruin Pot Roast:

1 (4-to-6 lb.) bear haunch

To Prepare the Marinade:

2 c. beef broth

½ tsp. salt

½ tsp. oregano

1 large onion, thinly sliced 

½ tsp. basil

1 tsp. paprika

Place all ingredients in deep bowl to marinate overnight. Turn haunch at least twice, ensuring meat is fully immersed. Add all to crock pot or slow cooker, cooking on “low” setting 1 hr. per lb. or until tender. 

Serve with a side order of Boston Baked Beans. Offer Boston Cream Pie for dessert. I’ll give you the recipes after I calm down - which may be never! 

GRRRRR!

Ca-n'yuk, n'yuk, n'yuk!